ABUSE: A UNIVERSAL PROBLEM

Abuse is a very sensitive subject. People do not want to deal with it or talk about it, but the church cannot be afraid to deal inside this area. God is more than willing and able to deal inside every area in our lives. So, the church must be prepared and equipped to deal with this type of subject. God has raised Lifesavers International to deal with these issues. If it is happening to you it is important. God is concerned about every aspect of your life. He created us and is concerned about us. God is concerned about how we feel, think, our desires, etc. We have to believe this. He did not put us down here to find our own way and do our own thing. That method has got man in trouble. This is why the abuse is out of hand. Think about it, what makes a grown man rape a three-month-old baby? What kind of pleasures can one get out of that? Something is going on and we need answers, because all of our homes can be affected at any time. No one is off limits. There is an enemy out there and he does not care about you, your children, your spouse or anybody.

The enemy comes to destroy you and everything associated with you. We are indeed living in a hostile generation. For now we see children killing children. We have little boys raping other little boys and little girls turned out and caught up in lesbianism. Satan is systematically dulling our senses. We have no compassion, mercy or grace. People just do not care. You may be one who was abused or know someone who has or you have been affected by abuse in some kind of way. The question that once puzzled me was, “Why me?”

Abuse - 1. To use wrongly or improperly: misuse.

2. To trick or deceive.

3. To injure by maltreatment. Webster’s Dictionary

I spent years devastated trying to answer why? I felt I didn’t deserve this, and this “why” became so important to me that it ruled my life.

THE NEGATIVE EFFECTS OF ABUSE

Abuse has some very devastating effects. I grew up very selfish and mean hearted. In my quest to answer that question “why,” I became too important. It was all about me. I internalized my pain and I felt no one understood this thing that happened to me. The man who abused me has gone on about his business and never said he was sorry, so I felt I had to look out for me. I didn’t care about anyone or how they felt. I was bitter, very hateful and unloving. Over a period of time I became desensitized to any regular God built-in emotions. I came to a point where love did not move me. You know you have a problem when you know someone loves you and that does not move you. So, I started looking back over my life to when I was abused and I realized I had not made any progress. Twelve-years after my abuse I saw I was still back there. I realized that I was doing something wrong. I wanted to be happy, but I wasn’t. I wanted to love, but I couldn’t, but wanted to. I wanted to be free, vulnerable and to love. However, I was still mean and hateful to the point that I wanted retribution. I wanted someone to pay for what had happened to me, and quite a few people paid. We cannot think that we can have all these negative dispositions and it does not touch people. It touches everyone with whom we are involved. Until we forgive, our relationships will be dysfunctional because we always go into relationships looking for what someone can give. Then as soon as they step on your toes, you get rid of them. My heart was never vulnerable. Men did not have a chance with me. People can and do deal with abuse differently. There was another destructive pattern I noticed in my life. I saw that in the relationships I had, I had become an abuser, not physically, but verbally and mentally. I had become just what I hated. Abuse brings trauma to the soul.

St. Luke 6:37

Judge not, and ye shall not be judged: condemn not, and ye shall not be condemned: forgive, and ye shall be forgiven: .

Forgive - 1. To excuse for a fault or offense: PARDON.

2. To renounce anger or resentment against.

3. To absolve from payment of. Webster’s Dictionary

So, I sought the Lord to get out of this and I went on a search. If I could just get the answer to the why, I felt I could go on with my life. However, I had to be willing to accept God’s answer, not what my mind could drum up, and be content with what God gave me. Some things I had to accept. We have to open our heart and let God speak to our hearts and trust Him to take us further. When we deal with God He is looking at the disposition of our heart. I wanted to move and wanted to be free. I was tired of being miserable and I hated life. I saw life through the abuse and everything I saw was negative. I don’t care how good something was, I was going to find the negative in it. God judges the disposition of every man’s heart.